Honey, I Joined a Cult Embraces Megalomania in the Best Way
Cults interest me. In the pantheon of true crime, I probably find cults the most interesting. The ability for a figurehead to convince a group of people to follow them based on nothing but lies. It’s an intersection of charisma and madness that drives cults. Historically, cults usually don’t end well. What if we…what if we made it cartoon-y and goofy? Honey, I Joined a Cult seeks to put a lighter spin on the cult life by letting you build your own cult. I was sold. Make my own cult? Hilarious.
I started out in the fairly in-depth cult creation screen. I wanted a cult based on something topical, and long-lasting. I knew what I had to do. I would base a cult around the 2019 Todd Phillips film Joker. I got to work. My cult leader was named Jack Napier, but would be referred to as, “The Actual Jonker”. That’s not a misspelling. Calling The Joker “The Jonker” is a longstanding joke with the other DreadXP writers. So Jack “The Actual Jonker” Napier was set as my cult leader. My acolytes would be known by the title of “Jonker Trainee” or “Jonkers” in the plural. I was given an option to choose their cult outfit. They were set up with red elf suits and hockey masks with clown-ish paint on them. This was coming together well.
Honey, I Joined a Cult gives you a lot of fun options when it comes to building a cult. I then went on to name the Jonker’s holy room, where sermons would be held nightly. It was called a “Jonker Society”. All Jonkers live in a society, and thus, their holiest room had to be a society. If you aren’t aware of “Jonker” or “we live in a society” then I’m sorry. This is not funny for you, but confusing. Inside the Jonker Society was a lectern and a holy relic. This relic is also customizable in the cult building screen. I chose a large, rectangular monolith as a representation of a bluray copy of Joker. My cult members would gather in the Jonker society nightly to hear sermons at the foot of the Joker bluray.
I only had a few members starting out, and I needed to change that. But first, my jonkers needed amenities. You can’t run a cult compound in Honey, I Joined a Cult without meeting the needs of your followers and members. I built a canteen, bedrooms, and bathrooms. I needed to meet their basic needs before anything else. I built a meditation room, so they could ruminate on how much they loved The Jonker. I built a research lab, as it is the way to research new room types. Now that their needs were met, it was time to build up my flock. I started running missions into the city, where my jonkers could preach the good word and bring in more jonkers.
Once a follower enters your compound, they’ll start going to sermons and meditations, all while being fleeced out of their hard-earned cash. Followers don’t live on your compound, nor wear the uniform of your cult. Over time, as they build up an itch to join, you can ask them to become part of the cult. If they agree, you’re given access to things like changing their names. Thus, my cult grew. Gone were Amy, Clyde, and Rodney. They were now Joaquin, Jack, and Jared. Your cult members can level up, and you can assign skill points for things like espionage and public speaking. These skills help in different areas. A high public speaking skill may help a member do a better job in a mission to go into the city to find new recruits.
As you bring in more followers and turn them into members, you can build new areas that allow for things like researching new rooms. My main goal was to use my research lab to research new meditation areas and things like a recreation room for my cult members. It’s kind of a mix between Prison Architect and The Sims. You don’t want your cult members to starve, or die. You can build an infirmary to treat their wounds. Honey, I Joined a Cult doesn’t get as deep as something like Prison Architect, and I think that’s fine. You don’t have to painstakingly set up a power grid or running water. It just works out of the box. It gives you more time to focus on the fun stuff, like building a megachurch to give sermons about your chosen cult diety.
It’s not all fun and games, though. Sending people out to preach the good jonker word was bringing down heat points. Heat points are essentially how much law enforcement, protestors, and the media are noticing what you’re doing. Cults aren’t technically illegal, but if you’re doing it right, you don’t want the police around. This heat can be dissipated by just not doing things that generate heat. Just cool your heels at the compound, wait for people to forget. Doing something like kicking a member out of the cult, or them leaving on their own, builds heat. Keeping your cult members happy, or at least brainwashed into thinking they’re happy, is a big part of the game.
What’s on display so far is impressive. Even in early access, there is a lot of systems to mess around with in Honey, I Joined a Cult. I was considering starting another cult that worships something else funny; maybe Shrek? Nothing is funnier to me than watching these goofs walk around in their jonker masks, worshipping a bluray. If that sounds like something you’d be interested in, give Honey, I Joined a Cult a look. You can check it out HERE.
Categorized:Editorials
