7 Netflix Hotties That Should Be In ‘The Lost Boys’ Remake
I was anti-remaking The Lost Boys. It is a damn near-perfect vampire movie and probably my favorite of the subgenre. I would rather we do something else and let us all celebrate any nods or similarities. However, after doing some soul searching, I remembered that at the end of the day, the original movie was an excuse to get a bunch of talented hot actors on the same set. The number of times I watched this movie as a child before catching Michael’s name. I believe this is because I was so invested in the plot.
The Plot:
Or because I was hoping to someday find someone that looks at me the way David looks at Michael:
This movie feels like someone’s diary was brought to life. Like, some kid whipped out their Lisa Frank gel pens and wrote fan fiction about both Corys, Jason Patric in a curly mullet situation, and Kiefer Sutherland surrounded by quiet vampire boys with hair goals. Is it any wonder most of us are obsessed with this 80s thirst trap masquerading as a film?
So, while humming “Cry Little Sister” and dancing in my leg warmers, I wondered if maybe this remake was not such a bad idea. It can be its own horny awakening for newer generations like the original was for all of us. This led me to get out my old Trapper Keeper and ask myself whomst might make good additions to The Lost Boys’ lusty legacy. The original cast of youths was incredibly talented outside of being gorgeous. I volunteered as tribute to find award-worthy actors that are also drool-worthy. I present seven actors you can see on Netflix right now that should be signed for this reboot!
My Dream Squad
Ahad Raza Mir, Plays Arjun Batra in Resident Evil
The timeline is divided about this new Resident Evil, but one thing we can agree on is Ahad. He is just out here being hot in sweaters and making us rethink what we know about the Weskers’. As someone who used to live for the video games, and watched enough of the movies, I can honestly say we never had it so good in my day. Argue with your momma because I am about to hit play on Netflix and make my way back to the fandom.
Chance Perdomo, Plays Ambrose Spellman in Chilling Adventures of Sabrina
If Chance was not in your top three reasons for watching this show, then you were not watching for the right reasons. Start it over and give this cutie all of his flowers. He gave us THE Ambrose Spellman. Otherwise known as, “Sabrina’s pansexual chaotic good cousin.” He was also a 134-year-old warlock that never needed magic to get our attention because we all leaned forward on day one. To be honest, I don’t know why he’s not cast in everything but we should gladly snatch him for this project.
Elliot Page, Plays Viktor Hargreeves in The Umbrella Academy
Elliot Page has always been a fantastic actor. So, it is no surprise he is killing it as Viktor in The Umbrella Academy. Because he already has the resume and accolades, and I am thirsty, I would like to point you to his Instagram, where he only posts thirst traps now. Elliot literally woke up and said, “They must not know about me,” and has been correcting us ever since. We love to see it and think he would definitely be a Lost Boy to remember.
Gong Yoo, Plays Recruiter in Squid Game
I have had both eyes on this man since Train to Busan because look at him. He is also a damn good actor. That’s why I jumped at Squid Game when I found out he is, in fact, who was going to be there. I was never going to get enough of him, but I still wish we had more time with him in the show. The Lost Boys remake/reimagining/refill would be a lovely fix for this daddy that is somehow 43 years old. Seeing how he refuses to age, we can do this whenever. However, I am impatient and would like it now!
Jamie Campbell Bower, Plays Henry Creel / One / Vecna in Stranger Things (Season 4)
The casting director of Stranger Things fully snapped this season. After three seasons, they decided Joe Keery’s Steve cannot be the only eye candy on screen anymore. The rest is Vecnussy history. The fact that Jamie was not only hot in his own right, but that he then backed the car over us while wearing what looks like a hundred pounds of prosthetics to show us that he could still get it is a mood. He is The Lost Boys reboot/rewake/Riri, and if there is not an offer on the table, then what is the purpose of even doing it? If you won’t let him be a lost boy, then give him the saxophone. If the Saxophone is not part of this new aesthetic then let him play the guitar, piano, triangle, etc. because daddy is also a musician. Basically, put Jamie in this project. Send tweet.
Joseph Quinn, Plays Eddie Munson in Stranger Things (Season 4)
Heavy is the head that wears this wig and still manages to get us talking. Again, the Stranger Things casting director wanted a raise this season and fucking snapped! The wig department tried to hide Joseph from us for his own safety, but it did not work. It only gave us more to unpack as we looked through Eddie Munson to the actor underneath that heavy headpiece and asked, “Why not both?” This poor man will never know peace again, and a lot of us are trying to figure out why the denim vest is doing it for us. Make him the lead Lost Boy, or the new version of Michael, and do not talk to me until you do! He’s the full package and Netflix still has the wig. Why is this not already happening??? Don’t make me speak to a manager…
Rahul Kohli, Plays Sheriff Hassan in Midnight Mass
I have not seen Midnight Mass, but I have whiplash from the photos of Rahul they used in their advertising. I have seen him in other stuff and was worried about trying to sneak him onto this list of Netflix hotties via iZombie. Everyone says he is even better in Mass than the other places I have seen him, and I love to hear it. Especially because he would make one of the best Lost Boys if anyone is still listening to me. Let us keep him in the genre, onscreen, and put him in the property that exists for talented hot actors. As a 36-year-old looking into a silver fox future, we could easily do a couple of different things with him in this thing. I’m not the only one that would like to see it either because the internet agrees that he is HOT.
So, yeah. I have been very vocal whenever rumors of a new version of The Lost Boys came up. However, that was before I turned my thirsty eye toward some actors that I want to see more of. Since the original Lost Boys crew was wildly chaotic, I think we could find homes for quite a few (if not all of them) that make sense. As the project keeps getting postponed, we might even need a new cast soon, and I am keeping my wallet ready in case anybody cares. Also, if anyone is reading this, please let some of these Netflix casting directors handle this project. More importantly, ask them if they want an assistant. Because I would love to lend my skills to this worthy cause.
Here’s the obligatory Eddie Munson gif we have to use whenever we type Stranger Things. Look at it and then give him his rightful role in this new Lost Boy situation posthaste!
Let me know if I found your Lost Boy at @misssharai.
