The Horrors of Fantasia: The End

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Jul 26, 2006
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The inevitable post-Fantasia blues are already starting to set in. After nearly three weeks of sleeping until noon, watching movies until midnight, and drinking and talking until 4am, normal life seems a bit humdrum in comparison. That said, some of the killer flicks we saw will likely pick up distribution due to their reception at Fantasia, and there are always the inevitable DVD releases to look forward to. So, what films did we discover during the fest that you should be keeping your eyes peeled for over the next weeks and months? Without further ado, the completely unauthorized Dread Central Fantasia awards:

Best Film That Will Be Remembered When The Director Is A Freakin’ Horror Icon: Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon, directed by Scott Glosserman (review)

Best Film So Scary That It’ll Make Your Nuts Run For Cover…Even If You Don’t Have Nuts: The Descent, directed by Neil Marshall (review)

Best Film That Really Makes You Wonder Why The Hell The Guy Hasn’t Directed A Picture in Twenty Years: 39: A Film By Carroll McKane, directed by Gary Sherman (review)

Best Film That Proves Only Whackjobs Live In The Suburbs: Neighborhood Watch, directed by Graeme Whifler (review). Honorable Mention: The Lost, directed by Chris Sivertson (review)

Best Splatterific 80’s Throwback That Puts The Chunk Back In Chunkblower: Isolation, directed by Billy O’Brien (review). Honorable Mentions: Wilderness, directed by Michael J. Bassett; Evil Aliens, directed by Jake West (review)

Best Art House Horror Film That You Should Risk Seeing Even If It Means You Have To Sit Next To An Asshole In A Turtleneck: The Living and the Dead, directed by Simon Rumley (review)

Best Short That Proves It’s Not The Length But The Girth: The Separation, directed by Robert Morgan (review). Honorable Mention: Day Of John, directed by Christopher R. Nash (review)

Best It’s Not A Horror Film But It’ll Freak The Shit Out Of You Anyway: Pusher 3, directed by Nicolas Winding Refn (review). Honorable Mention: Edmond, directed by Stuart Gordon (review)

Best Film You’ll Never See On The Bigscreen Because You Missed Fantasia: Viy, directed by Konstantin Ershov, Giorgi Kropachyov, Aleksandr Ptushko. Honorable Mention: White of the Eye, directed by Donald Cammell (review)

Best Film That Makes You Wonder How The F*ck Did They Screw This Up? Snoop Dogg’s Hood Of Horror, directed by Stacy Title. Honorable Mention: Frostbiten, directed by Anders Banke (review)

Best Film That I Hated So Much I’d Rather Be Blinded Than Watch It Again: Feed, directed by Brett Leonard (review). Honorable Mention: Tape Number 31 (review), directed by Agan

Only 363 more days until Fantasia 2007… If I were you, I’d book my ticket now. I’m so sad it’s over I wrote a haiku:

Sweet Fantasia

Eighteen days of movie bliss

…And constipation

Until next year…

– Evil Andy

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