Classroom 6 (2015)
Starring Valentina Kolaric, Mike McLaughlin, Maurice Mejia
Directed by Jonas Odenheimer
Director Jonas Odenheimer grabs the found-footage rein, twists it firmly in his hand, and attempts to hang on for those precious moments, hoping to distance his latest film, Classroom 6, from the massive conglomeration of stomach-churning, nausea-transfixed presentations that have come before it. Was the mission accomplished? With a set of googly-eyes and an upturned gut (mainly from the camera work), I can say “not really.”
Opting for more of the atmospheric scare than the accustomed smash-bang fright in your face, the movie focuses on an overzealous reporter (Kolaric) who leads her rag-tag collection of camera-lugging misfits onto a college campus to collect as much paranormal evidence as they can about the dreaded “Classroom 6.” Get your vomit bags ready, passengers, as this is going to be a bumpy flight.
The setup is duly noted as to what we will be (attempting) to watch is archival footage of what has been the only declaration of proof as to what happened to these unfortunate (and now missing) souls. With the classroom being supposedly used as a portal to hell (whatever happened to fossilized caves?), the crew, with recording equipment at the ready, sets up shop and suffers the normal fate of so many camera-hugging dolts before them, routinely being picked off one-by-one in less than glorious fashion. It’s derivative, repetitive, and takes far too long to get even the slightest bit of steam under its ass.
The final 25 minutes of the film do attempt to ratchet up the tension and sense of fear, and I’ll give it a moderately passable point for that, but having to sit through two thirds of dumb jokes and stale repartee between the crew members was a minute form of torture that I’ve inflicted upon myself FAR too many times with these movies, and it takes a little more of my soul with it every time I pry open my eyes to one… but I digress.
Odenheimer (who also co-wrote) had only directed short films up until this one, and the idea of starting off your feature-length career with a found-footage film is a courageous one, especially when you’re fully expecting a hearty lambasting from us evil critic-types. In any event, you can file Classroom 6 into the neatly categorized drawer of “been there, done that,” and just let it be… that is, unless you enjoy your intestines spun around like a thrill-park ride has malfunctioned to a catastrophic level, leaving its passengers doing the dizzy-dance for days afterwards. Other than that, keep your footing on solid ground and head to another classroom, please.
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Film
Categorized:Reviews
