Metalocalypse (DVD)

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Metalocalypse DVD (click for larger image)Starring Tommy Blacha, Brendon Small, Mark Hamill and Victor Brandt

Directed by Jon Schnepp & Chris Prynoski

Distributed by Turner Home Entertainment


The show is called Metalocalypse, seeming to blend all the things my generation has come to love including sex jokes, ridiculous violence and the power of METAL. Each episode centers on the animated band Dethklok, the most brutal band to ever walk the earth. In this rock worshiping reality that makes them more powerful than all the governments of the world. Fearing this power could eventually destroy the world, a secret society of powerful leaders sinks their group’s resources into researching and infiltrating Dethklok. Let’s meet the band…

  • Nathan Explosion – The band’s front man, resembling a young Pete Steele of Type O Negative, growling his way through his lyrics
  • Skwisgaar Skwigelf – The fastest guitarist alive likes milfs, gmilfs and..umm..the big girls.
  • William Murderface – Bassist. No one in the world is full of more hatred than him. And he hates no one more than he hates himself.
  • Toki Wartooth – Second Guitarist…if they turn up his amp.
  • Pickles – The Drummer. Government grade drugs no longer have any effect on him.

     DVD (click for larger image)Oddly, the show has very little plot. Rockers with far too much money and power go about their days, performing and recording their music and often, killing piles of their fans in the process, completely by accident. Some commit suicide as they await a new CD release while others are simply cut down by wayward stage effects. You could call it a cult with leaders who don’t really care for their followers, and tell them that often. To exacerbate things, the combined intelligence level of the band members is about 10 out of 100, making them much like a group of horny teenage boys who have been left back a number of years. This, of course, makes the show mind numbingly hysterical and highly addictive. Also, at around 11 minutes an episode, the toon is perfect for our ADD riddled society. More surprising than the body count of each episode is the fact that the music played by the band kicks some serious ass. Check out the sample at the end of this review.

    The Metalocalypse Season One 2 disk set features all 20 episodes, originally aired on Cartoon Network’s Adult Swim block. Here’s a rundown of my favorite moments…

    1. Seeking to record the most brutal album of all time, the band takes a Russian nuclear sub to the most brutal place on the planet…the Marianas Trench. While there, they isolate Toki who plays a happy little song called Underwater Friends. It’s a Disney moment.

    2. It’s Murderface’s Birthday and the band gets him a special present, Dr.Roxo, the rock and roll clown who likes to yell “I do cocaaaaaaine!!” He’s more than a little David Lee Roth, which makes it scary and fucking funny at the same time…and a little sad.

    3. The band is plagued by internal strife, so they hire a performance coach who rewards their breakthroughs with banana stickers, which they become addicted to.

    4. Waking a giant troll, the band must learn to play “Grandpas Instruments” to put him back to sleep. Nathan also attempts to order 100 beers…exactly…100 beers.

    5. After their cook is chopped into 50 pieces, the band heads to the supermarket to buy food and cook their diner. Having never cooked…or even bought food for them selves before, this is much like watching a dog try to operate a bicycle…or George W. Bush use a phone.

    Also included in the set are hidden deth-features, most of which you can watch clips of on the Adult Swim website. Here’s a list…

    Disk 1:

    Metalocalypse DVD (click for larger image)

  • Murderface’s full bass solo, played with his package.
  • Skwisgaar’s guitar lesson
  • The pope attempting to play guitar. (listening to him breathe is the most agonizing moment of the set)
  • Skwisgaar on the set of their Thunderhorse video, in which he’s taking a girl from behind.
  • Nathan reads Hamlet for books on tape (the funniest fucking thing you’ll ever watch..and it goes on for 18 MINUTES!!!)
  • Murderface playing the video game Wheelchair Bound

    Disk 2:

    The band sits in a room as if being interviewed on a series of topics, the first being…

  • Family – Toki: Family…pants down…spank.
  • Fans – Pickles: Fucking take some kid scissors and cut your tongues off!
  • Education – Murderface: It’s all about learning.
  • Disasters – Pickles: I don’t want my drums flying around a tornado
  • Food – Nathan: The best breakfast is always the first meal of the day.
  • Future – Murderface: If a bass falls over in a Martian forest…
  • Insects – Murderface: Have you ever caught a scorpion?
  • Politics – Skwisgaar: You have two guys standing there and then there’s rocks…
  • Women – Skwisgaar: Girls loves it when you takes control
  • Morhaus Tour! – Follow your tour guide Facebones through Dethklok’s gargantuan compound.

    There is also a most brutal moment’s montage, set to Dethklok music.

    It is baffling that more people have not heard of this cartoon yet, probably because Cartoon Network does next to no promotion for the show. I’m sure, by now, you are in shock that a cartoon with so many flying body parts hasn’t come across your horror fiending radar already! Consider this your smack on the back of the head. Season 1 is in stores now (along side a cd of all the Dethklok music) and season two is under way, airing every Sunday night on Adult Swim. For more info and clips from episodes, hit up Adult Swim.

    MOVIE

    5 out of 5

    Extras

    5 out of 5

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